-currently working on an album whose conception is solely centered around my lackluster lovelife and the women who have rejected me. The album is dedicated to the Mexican man in San Cristobal who ate my first cokenail, and is possibly the only non-related person in this world to have loved me. In retrospect, I wish I would have gotten his name considering he may be my soulmate. As soon as I finish mixing it down and work out hosting, I will post the rest.

Track 1: "Witchy Little Bitch"
They say to have loved and lost, but so far I have seen little to no benefit to being with women over a realdoll. The pain that results from the inevitable rejection is far worse than the ecstacy of getting laid.

Track 2: "Behind The Door"
My father once remarked jokingly that I may have been behind the door when God passed out brains. I think He may also have been passing out the manual on interaction with society at the same time.

Track 3: "May Her Womb Be Barren Until The End of Her Days"
Though I don't blame the women unfortunate enough to have crossed my path, since they all seem to be in agreement that I am not worthy of female companionship, much less the love I so crave, I curse those who are deceitful.

Track 4: "The Valley of Humiliation"
All of your life, they tell you that you're great. Just do well in school and get a decent job or move out of your parents' house, and some woman will like you. The greatest agony is discovering that there is some dimension of life that you cannot see, and feeling left behind by ten years, not knowing what you are missing or what's wrong because everyone is too nice to tell you.

Track 5: "To Never Know Love"
What if you didn't know if you'd ever been in love? What if you didn't know if anyone would ever love you? The only love I have known is that of family. Everyone else who said they loved me lied, and I cannot think of a better reason to start travelling and find my place.

Track 6: "Vedrana Says There's No Spark" (Nazi FuckMachines)
When women don't know why they don't like you, they tell you there just wasn't a spark. There is no consensus on why women leave me, it varies from I moved too fast to I moved too slow to I am boring concerning sex/conversation/nightly activity. I think it is a hormone my body produces that evokes thoughts of nazi fuckmachines. The pressure to purchase a mailorder bride has never been greater.

Track 7: "Bad in Bed, Bad in Conversation, Looks Like a Bum"
L. E. Milliman told me once that she loved me. That was several months before cheating on me, telling me that she thought I was boring in bed, boring conversationally, that she didn't like being with me because I looked like a bum, and that I was "emotionally unsupportive". She won't tell me what being exciting in bed entails, though I suspect it involves having an australian accent and a bigger dick.

Track 8: "Tentschert's flying solo"
Karla told me that she needed to "fly solo" for awhile when she dumped me. After I recounted my stories of rejection from other women to her later, she had the gall to suggest that being single is fun. She is either stupid or incredibly insensitive. She also told me that she "didn't want to hold me back", which is such a horrible way to break up with someone it is laughable. Later I heard that she is fucking an employee of amazon.com. She apparently prefers to hold back men who have steady income, and does not think being single is as fun as she suggests.